


i’ll never let go

by cass22499



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Destiel Wedding, Fix-It, Fluff, M/M, One Shot, Post-Canon Fix-It, Slow Dancing, Songfic, Wedding Fluff, Weddings, brief mentions of homophobia, deancas wedding
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-15
Updated: 2021-02-15
Packaged: 2021-03-16 11:15:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,390
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29452911
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cass22499/pseuds/cass22499
Summary: slow dancing and reflection at dean and cas’ wedding
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester, Eileen Leahy/Sam Winchester (background), Kaia Nieves/Claire Novak (Background)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 34





	i’ll never let go

They’re a couple hours into the wedding, first dances and father/daughter/son dances giving way to an open dance floor. Dean and Cas are entwined, slowly rocking side to side with their arms wrapped around each other. They had been quietly talking for a few songs, but their soft spoken words had fallen away as they simply basked in their love for one another. Dean hasn’t really been paying attention to anything around him, vaguely aware of other couples dancing around them. He’s pretty sure Sam and Eileen are a few feet away, taking a moment for themselves in between Crowley watching and general chaos control. Dean briefly thinks he should be worried that Crowley will take this opportunity to try for the mic again, but pushes it aside in favor of burying his face in his husbands neck. _His husband._ The novelty of that phrase makes his breath catch and he’s not quite sure it will ever go away. As he loses himself in their gentle swaying, Dean slowly becomes more aware of his surroundings, just enough to register the song that has begun to play over the speakers. It’s another slow song, but not one he recognizes. He goes to zone out again as the gentle plucking of guitar strings fill his ears, but pauses when he hears the lyrics of the first verse.

_I swear to God, when I come home  
I'm gonna hold you so close  
I swear to God, when I come home, I'll never let go  
Like a river, I flow to the ocean I know  
You pull me close, guiding me home_

Images of every time he’s lost Cas spring unbidden to his mind, causing him to unconsciously tighten his hold on the man in his arms. Briefly he feels a pang in his heart, but it’s quickly replaced by a sense of safety. He knows it’s never going to stop hurting, the memories of Cas leaving him, unwillingly or not. But he knows now that no matter how many times he’s lost Cas, he’ll always come back to him. _“Just like a river to the ocean,”_ he thinks with a smirk as he listens to the singer close out the first verse before launching into the chorus.

_And I need you to know that we're  
Fallin' so fast, we're fallin' like the stars, fallin' in love  
And I'm not scared to say those words  
With you I'm safe, we're fallin' like the stars, we're fallin' in love_

Dean’s breath catches in his throat again. He thinks of every time he wishes he had said something, had told Cas just how much he meant to him. Of every time the words got caught in his throat, like he was forbidden from speaking about how he truly felt. Years of self-hatred, of being told that what he was was wrong and disgusting, that his feelings somehow made him less weighing on him until he felt like he was choking. It wasn’t until the man, _the angel_ , in his arms had told Dean that he loved him, that he loved the _whole world because of him_ , had looked at him like he was the most precious thing in the world, that Dean began to believe that maybe this wasn’t wrong. That _he_ wasn’t wrong. It wasn’t until they had fallen through a rift between worlds, their arms wrapped around each other not unlike they were right now, inky blackness releasing it’s grip on Cas as Dean hauled him up to crash their lips together, a near constant stream of _i love you’s_ whispered between kisses, that for the first time Dean truly felt safe enough to let those words fall from his lips.

_I swear to God, I can see  
Four kids and no sleep  
We'll have one on each knee, you and me, hmm_

The beginning of the second verse causes a small smile to grow on Dean’s face as he picks his head up from where he had been nuzzling into Cas’ neck and rests his chin on his shoulder. His gaze wanders to the tables dotted along the edges of the dance floor, spotting Jack sitting at one along with Patience, Alex, and Krissy, the four talking animatedly about something or other. He only has a moment to wonder where Claire is before he spots her, the image before him making him soften as tears well in his eyes. A few feet behind Cas, Claire is swaying on the dance floor with Kaia wrapped in her arms, the two dancing almost as close together as he and Cas are. Claire’s eyes are closed and a soft smile graces her lips, but almost as if she can feel him watching her, she opens her eyes to meet his gaze. For a second he thinks she’s going to shy away, try to act like he didn’t catch her with her guard down in a way he’s never seen before. Instead her smile grows just a fraction as she inclines her head to him in acknowledgment. Dean’s smile grows as well as he returns her nod before closing his eyes once again. He remembers the scared and broken young girl he met so many years ago, a girl that reminded him so much of himself. Warmth fills his heart as he thinks of the young woman she’s grown to be, grateful to have even had a fraction of a hand in helping her along the way. They may not have gotten along at first but he’s glad they were able to get past what had happened with the mark. He’s even more glad that Claire had finally been able to forgive Cas. He knows how much Cas cared for her and how much he tried to do right by her, and slowly but surely they had made progress. After watching their father/daughter dance earlier, he knows better than ever that they’ll be alright. Dean also knows that he and Cas will never be able to replace Jimmy and Amelia and that they would never dream of replacing them, but he hopes that wherever Jimmy and Amelia are in heaven that they know that he and Cas tried their best.

Listening to the second chorus, Dean thinks that he’ll have to ask Charlie the name of the song. He had been just a little reluctant to let her have full control over their wedding playlist, but as the singer dips into a final verse before breaking into the bridge, he finds he’s glad they let the redhead pick the music.

_I swear to God, every day  
He won't take you away  
'Cause without you, babe, I lose my way_

_Oh, I'm in love (I'm in love)  
Oh, I'm in love (I'm in love)  
Oh, I'm in love (I'm in love)  
Oh, I'm in love (I'm in love)  
Oh, I'm in love (I'm in love)  
Oh, I'm in love (Fallin' like the stars)_

Feeling something nudge the side of his head, Dean picks his head up off Cas’ shoulder and opens his eyes to find Cas already looking at him. The softness of Cas’ gaze and the small uptick of his lips causes Dean’s heart to stutter for a moment as he returns his husband’s look. One of Cas’ arms comes down from where he had them wrapped around Dean’s shoulders, reaching to the small of his back where Dean’s own arms were wrapped around him. Grabbing one of Dean’s hands, he brings it up to his lips and places a small kiss on the knuckles, his eyes never leaving Dean’s. Dean feels his breath catch a third time as he stares at the man in front of him. Slowly leaning forward, he presses his lips to Cas’, feeling more than hearing the sigh that falls from his husband’s lips as they melt into the kiss. As the final chorus ends and the song fades into the next, Dean knows that nothing could or will ever take Cas away from him again. To hell with “til death do us part”. They could have this, _forever._

_And I need you to know that we're  
Fallin' so fast, we're fallin' like the stars, fallin' in love  
And I'm not scared to say those words  
With you I'm safe, we're fallin' like the stars, we're fallin' in love_

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading! the song is falling like the stars by james arthur  
> you can find me at [feraldean](%E2%80%9C) on tumblr


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